Steadfast…

My breath prayer for the day comes from Psalm 57 in today’s daily lectionary;

My heart is steadfast, O God
my heart is steadfast.

I do not embody the fullness of truth in my living,
I am still wandering in the wilderness of doubt and confusion.

My heart is steadfast, O God
my heart is steadfast.

I so easily am tempted to self-righteousness
when I find the joy of obedience to you.
I can slide into a self-satisfaction,
believing that knowing the truth and practicing it more fully
somehow means that I possess the truth
and that I have become fundamentally different than others.

My heart is steadfast, O God
my heart is steadfast.

It is SO HARD to hope,
because hope is not wishing for something to happen,
it is not passively anticipating an event to occur.
No,
Hope is worked toward,
requires energy, time, intellect, muscles.
Hope is fostered through contributing meaningfully to society and world.
Hope is fostered when the darkness seems to overcome our small efforts,
when others laugh at us, consider us absurd relics of another era, or hopelessly idealistic dreamers,
it is then that we confront them in our small way
with our relentless efforts to seek your hope.

My heart is steadfast, O God
my heart is steadfast.

This day and every day,
may I be gripped by the hope of your kingdom.
Gripped
So captured by that hope that I work, and dream, and work,
so captured that I embrace the pain,
the pain of the deep darkness of our existence,
the darkness that threatens to overwhelm.
So captured that I reject using the tools of darkness as part of a desire to end the darkness;
tools like violence, self-righteousness, legalism, and cheap grace,
and instead embrace the supposed insanity of sacrificial love, of peaceableness,
of primarily embracing those on the margins rather than seeking the big solutions of the powerful.

My heart is steadfast, O God
my heart is steadfast.

Ensnare me in your kingdom, Lord.
Hem me in in front and behind.
So capture my heart that nothing can shake me from the joy of your vision for your world,
to believe that heaven is not reserved for somewhere over there,
but that your dream is for heaven to come here,
for people that are so heavenly-minded that we can’t help but invest all of who we are in your creation.

My heart is steadfast, O God
my heart is steadfast.

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